100%

In the weeks after I delivered, it was easy to use numbers to explain how I was feeling. For example, on a scale of 1-10, my pain could be a 5. Or "I'm feeling about 80% today." But recently I've had a few people ask me, "So, are you 100% now?"

That question really throws me for a loop. 100%? I don't know what 100% means anymore. If it means that I feel like I felt before I had William, then I will never be 100%. For one, my belly button and other body parts have forever changed and there's no going back. But maybe more importantly, I have changed. I have a different life now, and there's definitely no going back.

A few months ago a "100%" day might mean that I wake up, feel rested, feel successful at work, check a few things off the household to do list, eat dinner with Curtis and watch a good TV show. But now that wouldn't be a "100% successful day."

I've thought that maybe 100% means how I feel emotionally, whether or not I feel confident and successful in my body and in my mothering. No, that can't be it. Then no one would ask people if they felt 100%. Sheesh.

100% pain free? I don't know. maybe? usually?

100% happy? not usually.

Does anyone else feel 100%??? Probably not.

Or maybe 100% can just mean that I'm doing ok. The people in my house are eating and sleeping and generally happy. Yes, we're 100% people and 100% family.